By Rebecca Drew
THIS POLYAMOROUS couple are on the hunt for a bisexual woman to permanently join their relationship, so they can form a ‘throuple’ to make them stronger than ever.
Independent contractors, Mayra Acosta (26) and Justin Argueta (27) from Fontana, California, USA, met two years ago at a cannabis event and fell in love after seeing each other perform stand-up comedy and rap respectively on stage. For Justin, polyamory eliminates jealously which he says ruins most relationships, not just intimate ones but platonic too. Mayra believes that polyamory means that she has so much love inside her she can share it with more than one person at a time.
Justin is heterosexual and Mayra is bisexual, unlike other polyamorous relationships, the pair don’t have other partners and are strictly looking for another bisexual female to join them as a triad. Whilst they haven’t used Tinder to find their third person, they have been open about their quest on Instagram and have been on a few dates with women that haven’t worked out just yet.
“To me, polyamory is the absence of jealousy. It means being able to love your partner enough to understand their need to love others, not only yourself,” said Justin.
“Jealousy ruins most relationships, not only intimate but platonic ones as well. Brothers will be jealous of one another due to how much love and attention is given to them by their parents.
“I grew up with a lot of siblings, so I understood early on how much love one person can give. I also grew up with multiple mother figures so loving more than one person at a time is normal to me.
“We are a straight male and a bisexual female searching for a bisexual female to complete our triad or throuple. We are not swingers.
“We are open to casual hook ups with females, but we eventually want to find someone to add to our couple. How it works is if there is someone either of us might be interested in we’ll first bring it to the other’s attention.
“Then after agreeing we’ll start a group chat with that female to get to know them a bit and find out their intentions and expectations. If we are all on the same page at that point then we’ll go out on a date and see if we click in person.
“We don’t use dating sites like Tinder however we are very open about our relationship and interest in adding a female to our couple on our Instagram.
“We also prefer to meet people the old fashion way. As performers and entertainment enthusiasts, we go to a lot of different events where there are crowds of people. Both of us are pretty approachable and we tend to make friends or start conversations with strangers wherever we go.
“When it comes to the female we are interested in, she definitely needs to be on the same level as us. We are both lovers and givers so we are looking for someone who is also a lover and a giver.
“We don’t want someone who just wants to be pampered by two people or wants to take advantage of our love and kindness. We need someone with a big heart who won’t get jealous. We’re looking to make this couple stronger not weaker.”
Despite looking for a third person to join their relationship, Mayra and Justin insist that there is no rush to find their perfect match and hope to start a family one day.
The pair describe themselves as a team and say there is no room for jealousy and good communication is key to successful relationships.
“Jealousy is not really a factor in our relationship. From the beginning we’ve always been a team and as a team you have to be honest and open with each other,” said Mayra.
“My advice to everyone is to love yourself enough to be honest with yourself about what you need in life to make you happy. Be selfish when it comes to love and what you need and be honest with yourself and the world.
“If having more than one partner is what truly makes you happy then be honest about that and eventually you will find two people who want the same thing you do.
“It’s better than settling and living a lie or staying in a miserable relationship or cheating on your spouse.
“If we are honest about our needs from the beginning and refuse to settle for anything other than that then eventually the universe will give us what we attract. Every relationship is different but every great relationship is built on honesty and communication.”
The pair are often mistaken for swingers, who have ‘recreational’ sex with no emotional connection whereas polyamory is focussed more on love and feelings. Mayra adds that some strangers simply don’t understand what polyamory is.
“We get mixed reactions. People hate what they don’t understand and isn’t normal,” she said.
“A lot of people think we are just swingers, which we are not. Some people support us whether they understand us or not.
“Some people laugh at us and think we are joking or some even think we are crazy and we’ll never find someone to join our couple.”
