By Rebecca Drew
THIS YOUNG mumâs decision to breastfeed in public has been called a âBOOB SHOWâ by her own family and attracted DMs from men with creepy fetishes online.
Stay at home mum, Anna Carthy (22), from Renfrew, Ontario, Canada, fell pregnant with her son, Winn, who is now 18 months old when she was 19, and Anna knew immediately that she wanted to try breastfeeding.
Anna didnât know any other young mums who breastfed their children and she felt that healthcare professionals sometimes doubted her ability to nurse her son after he was born via c-section, as she wasnât actively encouraged to do so.
This only made Anna want to breastfeed even more and she started to post pictures on social media to inspire, support, and educate other women about breastfeeding.
As Winn grows older, Anna has found that people are increasingly judgemental of her decision to continue breastfeeding, with one extended family member calling the natural act a âboob showâ. Other people have told her that nursing her son is gross now that Winn is of an age where he can ask for milk himself, and she has even received a string of creepy messages from men on social media regarding her extended breastfeeding who say that they are jealous of her son.
These comments arenât going to put Anna off doing something she feels will give her son the best start in life. She has no plans to stop breastfeeding and feeds Winn on demand, in public, and at home, whenever he is hungry â sometimes upwards of 10 times a day.
She hopes that by sharing her story, sheâll be able to empower other women.
âI think I always wanted to âtryâ [breastfeeding] as people say, though I was made to feel as though there was a good chance I would fail,â said Anna.
âAt first, it was a little uncomfortable, feeling kind of exposed and having nurses grabbing your breasts to help you learn is awkward, but I quickly overcame this and have felt completely comfortable since.
âIt was definitely daunting, I knew some mums who breastfed, my own mum and stepmum for example, but I had never seen any, or very many, of my peers who were mothers do it.
âSo while I knew it was possible, I was unsure if it would be possible for me. Even after my emergency c-section, they said I âmay not want toâ, which was discouraging to say the least.
âThe reactions Iâve got are fairly positive, and those that were uneducated before quickly changed their thinking.
âThis being said, there are some family members of my sonâs father who said: âOh we better leave before the boob showâ in reference to feeding my son, and have also asked me to nurse in a different room if I visit their house. Theyâve commented on my posts, asking why it canât be âa private thingâ.
âIt definitely made me upset, especially considering it came from an elderly male. The same man said that my son breastfed too often and needed a bottle, he was unsupportive in general, and refused to let me openly nurse in their house.
âIt made me upset and feel objectified, and as though he was sexualising me and my child – especially considering he made that comment in my house which is a safe place. He made me even more determined to change peopleâs views on nursing.
âWhen Winn was small even well-meaning friends and family said: âI fully support breastfeeding but itâs weird once the kid can walk and ask for itâ or âitâs weird once they have teethâ.
âThese people though arenât openly negative towards me now, most of the time, though I and other extended nursing parents do often face criticism online.
âFor the most part, my posts have been well received – though Iâve received some creepy messages on Instagram regarding breastfeeding, which is another disgusting thing entirely.
âSome of those include things like; âwhat a lucky babyâ, âIâm jealous of that babyâ and âI wish I could be on your boob all nightâ.â
The World Health Organisation (WHO) recommend that children are exclusively breastfed for the first six months of life and state that it is safe for children to still be breastfed past the age of two years â despite some societal misconceptions.
Anna refuses to let these messages get her down and she intends to continue breastfeeding Winn until he no longer wants breastmilk.
She hopes to inspire other mums but she respects mums who donât wish to or are not able to feed their children in the same way.
âNursing a young child has its difficulties – nipples cracking, regulating milk, latch. Nursing an older child has its own difficulties – itâs demanding, sometimes it’s emotionally draining for me to have another human trying to touch me so often so we are learning boundaries,â she added.
âHeâs strong and sometimes he wiggles like a worm so I have to try and teach him to stay still because it hurts and heâs learning.
âThere are many misconceptions about breastfeeding an older kid – in particular, for one, people think itâs completely abnormal. In some cultures itâs extremely common, and even here, itâs more common than people know but often parents keep quiet about it.
âMy main goal is to show other mums it is possible, even if youâre young, and you can still be cool, fun, and yourself. Another major goal to open up a line of conversation so other people can message me and learn and ask questions and find support in their journey
âThe two biggest things in being successful in nursing is education and support. I feel like people who want to nurse often fail just because they donât have the education or support to be successful.
âSo often you hear people say they couldnât breastfeed and these parents often beat themselves up, and donât understand why they couldnât. In reality, nearly ninety-five per cent of women can breastfeed – women often lose supply because they donât have all the information.
âYour body makes as much milk as a baby takes. Your body tailors your supply to babyâs needs. Sometimes, baby is given a bottle and mum does not pump, so the body doesnât realise itâs time to make more, and thus thereâs no milk for when the baby needs it.
âWhile breastfeeding and extended breastfeeding isnât for everyone, and thatâs ok, it has many benefits and should be considered a positive thing.â
